The following poem was one that I wrote several years ago when I was told we were getting a divorce. The finality of it set in. I had been a wife for so long, I hadn’t even realized how to be just me. I hope that it inspires others that may be going through the same thing.
At once I saw no fault in your eyes,
Never thought you were capable of lies,
My heart beat faster when you were near,
I never thought that feeling would disappear.
My heart had wings, flew to cloud nine,
I was so happy you were all mine,
Your expansive knowledge amazed me,
From my past, I felt you saved me.
But throughout the years, bricks in hand,
You showed me how you take a stand,
With ever hurtful and painful memory,
You started to build what now you see.
I started to watch you closer still,
And analyzed what really I feel,
The mortar laid thicker with each lie,
I saw our love had started to die.
The pain and hurt so fully inside me,
Suppressed who I was meant to be,
I forgot who I was, I assumed your new role,
But in the mirror, I saw it taking its toll.
This wall is building around my heart,
The blindness of love is breaking apart,
Alone with myself, I find no comfort,
I’m screaming inside, “Abort! Abort!”
I push against this wall, I want out!
I’m tired of the negativity and doubt,
Like a bird in a cage, I want to be free,
Of this wall, you’ve built up around me.
I can’t breathe, I’m starving for true love,
I get up the courage and put on a glove,
Now fighting for my existence, It’s on now!
To your feet no more, will I ever bow.
One by one they start to fall down,
No more in your lies will I surely drown,
You can lay it on however thick,
But I will fight you forever, Brick by Brick.
By Charity Woods, 2011